Saturday, 15 January 2022 16:52

真神上帝的带领稳稳妥妥(上) 陆汝斌弟兄感恩分享

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你要把你的重担卸给耶和华,他必抚养你,他永不叫人动摇。(诗55:22)
	林:亲爱的朋友平安,今天非常高兴请到从台湾来,到处传基督福音的精神科医生陆汝斌弟兄,他要来分享他生命的见证。陆医生你好!
	陆;曹传道好,各位弟兄姐妹平安。
	林:请问陆医生你当初是在什么样的情况下信了耶稣的?
	陆:这对我来讲是一个非常重要的事,假如我不信耶稣,不但是非常恐怖,而且会是一个灾难。第一,自己从小生活在一个贫穷的家庭,我上小学一年级就被学校开除了,原因是我逃学超过半个学期。因为我上学时根本是心不在焉,到处玩,去钓青蛙啦,钓乌龟啊,不去上学。后来被强制转学到「屏东仁爱国小」,被编到「放牛班」。所以国中我唸的是屏东的「中正中学」,第一届的夜间部,算是进了国中。又为了比较近一点又转学,到了毕业时,操行倒数第二,主要的科目都不及格。记得导师来告诉我说,让你毕业是不合格,不让你毕业学校受的损失又太大啦。
	只要我没事干就把学校整排的玻璃全部打破,把每个排球扎个洞,把别人的便当偷走了,是个非常捣蛋的学生。学校最后权衡轻重就让我毕业了吧。毕业以后,那时台湾没有什么「联考」,屏东的学校,我都考过了,没有一个学校要我,我父亲就想送我到空军幼校去。等车子来接我,都快出门了,我妈妈突然说绝对不准我的儿女去唸军校,她就把我留下来。那就没有地方唸书啦,刚好屏东在内埔成立一个「美和中学」,是第一届高中。他们本来准备收三班学生,结果有一班学生因为考到比较好的学校不来唸,所以多出一班来。讲的坦白,我是走后门进去的。
	那时候眷村都很贫穷,烧饭都烧柴火、烧煤球,只能在院子。我就常常爬墙过去把人家烧饭的锅子拿走了,把米倒掉,把锅子卖掉,所以邻居对我非常讨厌。我妈妈就把我关在家里,不让我出去。我记得是一次教会的退修会,我当然去玩的。第三天晚上,谁讲道我不记得了,是个中年女士。讲到一个小女孩发高烧,神志不清楚,快过世了,她突然清醒对她的爸爸妈妈、牧师和周围的人说:「不要难过,天家再见。」
	像我这样每天混日子的人,一听到「天家再见」,心想为什么这个小女孩会有永生的盼望,我怎么什么盼望都没有?那天晚上我竟然到篮球场去祷告。我求神赦免我的罪,从那次以后,我突然间变了。还记得我唱诗歌“解脱了,解脱了,我终于解脱了!”从那时候我开始用功唸书,但唸得很辛苦,因底子太差,再加上我没有朋友,原来的朋友说我变成神棍了。记得我高二一个学期唸了27本参考书,国中和高中的一起唸完,一路拼上去,从第一次考试第五名,一直到高中毕业第一名,拿到当时高中屏东县长「文学奖」,中间还拿了两次「爱迪生奖」,是奖赏数理化最好的,现在想想是上帝的恩典。考大学的时候,我是学校第一届毕业生,学校对我们有很大的期望,希望我们能够考上好的大学。不料,我考试的前一两天拉肚子,拉的一塌糊涂,我非常好的化学只考了五分,所以榜上无名。父亲叫我去考军校,我整个志愿就填国防医学院,我被录取了!当时是牙科正取,医科备取。我妈反对,她觉得唸军校不好。记得走出家门的时候,妈妈嚎啕大哭,我跟妈妈说,如果分配我到牙科,我一定回来,如果是医科,我就读读看。后来才晓得我是倒数第五名,回头想是上帝早就安排好的。我这样的程度几乎没有办法跟上,我看不懂英文,所以每天和弟兄姐妹晚祷后,就拿个小椅子,到路边路灯下面看书。
	林:你说跟弟兄姐妹晚祷,是当时医学院就有基督教的团契?
	陆:是。晚祷后本来应该休息,而我就到路灯底下去唸书,一直到2-3年级才慢慢的跟上。有个很奇怪的事情,在我快要毕业前,我到精神科去实习。当时精神科的环境非常坏,1-200个病人在一个很拥挤的空间里面。有个很小的院子,我们医生住的就隔个木板在旁边。我每天早晨起来灵修的时候,都听到一个病人在隔壁唱歌,「友情,友情,人人都需要友情‧‧‧‧‧」有一天灵修完毕,我就向神祷告,我说:「神啊,为什么你的慈爱,通不过这铁门?如果你应许,我愿意进去。」家人都鼓励我去外科,骨科,我也很想做骨科。那天我有那样的祷告之后,不到一个礼拜,精神科主任来查房,他问我“喂,你愿不愿意做精神科啊?”听到那句话,我真的吓一跳。等主任走了,我赶快祷告说:「神啊,我上次的祷告是随便讲的,我不要做精神科,精神科的环境很坏,送到医院的病人都很骯脏」。但神一直带领我,而我也没有忘记神的呼召,因为我只填了一个志愿,好像就是「精神科」。
	记得在做实习大夫的时候,我跟神有个祷告,一个礼拜神就给我回应。我有很多挣扎,加上又有很多机会,我到部队去,做了很多外科手术,但是我始终没有忘记神的呼召,最后回到总医院做「精神科」。我实在不敢违背上帝的呼召,到今天毕业40年,做了37年精神科,但是我找不到任何心理治疗或任何药物,可以像我在一个月之内翻转过来,并且走了一段很长的孤单历程。因为我从高二翻转过来,一直到我大学3-4年级,我都没有朋友的。
	林:为什么没有朋友呢?
	陆:老的朋友看我是神棍,新的朋友看我是恶棍,都不愿意和我交往,只有上帝和我妈妈要我,我永远不敢忘记,神在我身上那么巨大奇妙的改变。
	林:感谢主,都是神的恩典。
	陆:到今天回想起来,当驻院大夫的第二年,我的肺长瘤,开了一刀,又肝脏长瘤,腮腺长瘤,身体也不好,我如果作外科的话,大概在45岁左右就被淘汰了。
	林:噢,原来神有这个美意。
	陆:神比我们更瞭解我自己,神早就看清楚我们是什么样的,只要你愿意跟随祂的脚踪行,永远是最美的。我们若去做自己想做的事情,是最可怜的,早就被淘汰,离开自己的工作岗位。我到今天还能为主做见证是神的恩典,我为什么做精神科医师,根本就是神安排的。
	林:是,那么在你做精神科大夫的整个过程当中,你有什么奇妙的经历?
	陆:这么多年来,跟外面有很多的接触,我接触到毒瘾很厉害的,同性恋的,家庭破碎的,惨不是有钱没钱的问题,有些人很有钱,过的还是很悲惨。这一路走过来,我看到神对我很多很多的祝福。有些病人,当我为他祷告,神医治他,超过我知识的范围。神也带领我重新到德州去学习精神药物,到耶鲁去学遗传,现在又带我去研究神经再生。我们在这世上奔忙,所得到的劳苦愁烦转眼成空,如飞而去。如果我们把上帝所赏赐给我们的,带到祂的面前来,祂会使水变酒,让我们荣神益人。我们只要愿意跟随祂的脚踪行,会得到意想不到的祝福。
	林:是,那么陆医师你觉得神给你最美妙的带领,可以用在传福音上的是什么?
	陆:我想「精神医学」是最靠近人的灵、魂、体。简单的说,魂跟体是分不开的,就是我们的感情、思想、意志,会造成身体的障碍。身体的障碍又会引起我们的感情思想意志和行为的改变。特别是在感情思想意志行为所造成的障碍特别多。在注意这种东西的时候,你也更容易碰他更深一层的东西,就是他灵的范围。我们看到很多人,他喝酒喝了一辈子,吸毒吸了一辈子,家里破碎的一塌糊涂,要把他带到神的面前,不但医治他的酒瘾、毒瘾,还让他重新被建立,何等的美好!
	林:是的,谢谢陆医师的分享,愿我们都在神的面前生命更新,重新活一遍。

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