Saturday, 15 January 2022 16:52

真神上帝的帶領穩穩妥妥(上) 陸汝斌弟兄感恩分享

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你要把你的重擔卸給耶和華,他必撫養你,他永不叫人動搖。(詩55:22)
	林:親愛的朋友平安,今天非常高興請到從台灣來,到處傳基督福音的精神科醫生陸汝斌弟兄,他要來分享他生命的見證。陸醫生你好!
	陸;曹傳道好,各位弟兄姐妹平安。
	林:請問陸醫生你當初是在什麼樣的情況下信了耶穌的?
	陸:這對我來講是一個非常重要的事,假如我不信耶穌,不但是非常恐怖,而且會是一個災難。第一,自己從小生活在一個貧窮的家庭,我上小學一年級就被學校開除了,原因是我逃學超過半個學期。因為我上學時根本是心不在焉,到處玩,去釣青蛙啦,釣烏龜啊,不去上學。後來被強制轉學到「屏東仁愛國小」,被編到「放牛班」。所以國中我唸的是屏東的「中正中學」,第一屆的夜間部,算是進了國中。又為了比較近一點又轉學,到了畢業時,操行倒數第二,主要的科目都不及格。記得導師來告訴我說,讓你畢業是不合格,不讓你畢業學校受的損失又太大啦。
	只要我沒事幹就把學校整排的玻璃全部打破,把每個排球扎個洞,把別人的便當偷走了,是個非常搗蛋的學生。學校最後權衡輕重就讓我畢業了吧。畢業以後,那時台灣沒有什麼「聯考」,屏東的學校,我都考過了,沒有一個學校要我,我父親就想送我到空軍幼校去。等車子來接我,都快出門了,我媽媽突然說絕對不准我的兒女去唸軍校,她就把我留下來。那就沒有地方唸書啦,剛好屏東在內埔成立一個「美和中學」,是第一屆高中。他們本來準備收三班學生,結果有一班學生因為考到比較好的學校不來唸,所以多出一班來。講的坦白,我是走後門進去的。
	那時候眷村都很貧窮,燒飯都燒柴火、燒煤球,只能在院子。我就常常爬牆過去把人家燒飯的鍋子拿走了,把米倒掉,把鍋子賣掉,所以鄰居對我非常討厭。我媽媽就把我關在家裡,不讓我出去。我記得是一次教會的退修會,我當然去玩的。第三天晚上,誰講道我不記得了,是個中年女士。講到一個小女孩發高燒,神志不清楚,快過世了,她突然清醒對她的爸爸媽媽、牧師和周圍的人說:「不要難過,天家再見。」
	像我這樣每天混日子的人,一聽到「天家再見」,心想為什麼這個小女孩會有永生的盼望,我怎麼什麼盼望都沒有?那天晚上我竟然到籃球場去禱告。我求神赦免我的罪,從那次以後,我突然間變了。還記得我唱詩歌“解脫了,解脫了,我終於解脫了!”從那時候我開始用功唸書,但唸得很辛苦,因底子太差,再加上我沒有朋友,原來的朋友說我變成神棍了。記得我高二一個學期唸了27本參考書,國中和高中的一起唸完,一路拼上去,從第一次考試第五名,一直到高中畢業第一名,拿到當時高中屏東縣長「文學獎」,中間還拿了兩次「愛迪生獎」,是獎賞數理化最好的,現在想想是上帝的恩典。考大學的時候,我是學校第一屆畢業生,學校對我們有很大的期望,希望我們能夠考上好的大學。不料,我考試的前一兩天拉肚子,拉的一塌糊塗,我非常好的化學只考了五分,所以榜上無名。父親叫我去考軍校,我整個志願就填國防醫學院,我被錄取了!當時是牙科正取,醫科備取。我媽反對,她覺得唸軍校不好。記得走出家門的時候,媽媽嚎啕大哭,我跟媽媽說,如果分配我到牙科,我一定回來,如果是醫科,我就讀讀看。後來才曉得我是倒數第五名,回頭想是上帝早就安排好的。我這樣的程度幾乎沒有辦法跟上,我看不懂英文,所以每天和弟兄姐妹晚禱後,就拿個小椅子,到路邊路燈下面看書。
	林:你說跟弟兄姐妹晚禱,是當時醫學院就有基督教的團契?
	陸:是。晚禱後本來應該休息,而我就到路燈底下去唸書,一直到2-3年級才慢慢的跟上。有個很奇怪的事情,在我快要畢業前,我到精神科去實習。當時精神科的環境非常壞,1-200個病人在一個很擁擠的空間裡面。有個很小的院子,我們醫生住的就隔個木板在旁邊。我每天早晨起來靈修的時候,都聽到一個病人在隔壁唱歌,「友情,友情,人人都需要友情‧‧‧‧‧」有一天靈修完畢,我就向神禱告,我說:「神啊,為什麼你的慈愛,通不過這鐵門?如果你應許,我願意進去。」家人都鼓勵我去外科,骨科,我也很想做骨科。那天我有那樣的禱告之後,不到一個禮拜,精神科主任來查房,他問我“喂,你願不願意做精神科啊?”聽到那句話,我真的嚇一跳。等主任走了,我趕快禱告說:「神啊,我上次的禱告是隨便講的,我不要做精神科,精神科的環境很壞,送到醫院的病人都很骯髒」。但神一直帶領我,而我也沒有忘記神的呼召,因為我只填了一個志願,好像就是「精神科」。
	記得在做實習大夫的時候,我跟神有個禱告,一個禮拜神就給我回應。我有很多掙扎,加上又有很多機會,我到部隊去,做了很多外科手術,但是我始終沒有忘記神的呼召,最後回到總醫院做「精神科」。我實在不敢違背上帝的呼召,到今天畢業40年,做了37年精神科,但是我找不到任何心理治療或任何藥物,可以像我在一個月之內翻轉過來,並且走了一段很長的孤單歷程。因為我從高二翻轉過來,一直到我大學3-4年級,我都沒有朋友的。
	林:為甚麼沒有朋友呢?
	陸:老的朋友看我是神棍,新的朋友看我是惡棍,都不願意和我交往,只有上帝和我媽媽要我,我永遠不敢忘記,神在我身上那麼巨大奇妙的改變。
	林:感謝主,都是神的恩典。
	陸:到今天回想起來,當駐院大夫的第二年,我的肺長瘤,開了一刀,又肝臟長瘤,腮腺長瘤,身體也不好,我如果作外科的話,大概在45歲左右就被淘汰了。
	林:噢,原來神有這個美意。
	陸:神比我們更了解我自己,神早就看清楚我們是什麼樣的,只要你願意跟隨祂的腳蹤行,永遠是最美的。我們若去做自己想做的事情,是最可憐的,早就被淘汰,離開自己的工作崗位。我到今天還能為主做見證是神的恩典,我為什麼做精神科醫師,根本就是神安排的。
	林:是,那麼在你做精神科大夫的整個過程當中,你有什麼奇妙的經歷?
	陸:這麼多年來,跟外面有很多的接觸,我接觸到毒癮很厲害的,同性戀的,家庭破碎的,慘不是有錢沒錢的問題,有些人很有錢,過的還是很悲慘。這一路走過來,我看到神對我很多很多的祝福。有些病人,當我為他禱告,神醫治他,超過我知識的範圍。神也帶領我重新到德州去學習精神藥物,到耶魯去學遺傳,現在又帶我去研究神經再生。我們在這世上奔忙,所得到的勞苦愁煩轉眼成空,如飛而去。如果我們把上帝所賞賜給我們的,帶到祂的面前來,祂會使水變酒,讓我們榮神益人。我們只要願意跟隨祂的腳蹤行,會得到意想不到的祝福。
	林:是,那麼陸醫師你覺得神給你最美妙的帶領,可以用在傳福音上的是什麼?
	陸:我想「精神醫學」是最靠近人的靈、魂、體。簡單的說,魂跟體是分不開的,就是我們的感情、思想、意志,會造成身體的障礙。身體的障礙又會引起我們的感情思想意志和行為的改變。特別是在感情思想意志行為所造成的障礙特別多。在注意這種東西的時候,你也更容易碰他更深一層的東西,就是他靈的範圍。我們看到很多人,他喝酒喝了一輩子,吸毒吸了一輩子,家裡破碎的一塌糊塗,要把他帶到神的面前,不但醫治他的酒癮、毒癮,還讓他重新被建立,何等的美好!
	林:是的,謝謝陸醫師的分享,願我們都在神的面前生命更新,重新活一遍。

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